fridays

sometimes i feel like i let the whole world down. then i think, did they have expectations to begin with? ):

dear, honestly don't know what i'd do without you.

argh, i'm pretty stressed out again.

why do i look upon some things as such burdens? i know for sure that's not my gifting.

PS22 choir

The world would do well to have more teachers like that.

From the teacher's youtube site:

PS22 is a choir made up of 5th grade students of an elementary school in Staten Island.

Music can be the greatest teacher in its own right.

They are so so beautiful (:

oh joy, that was nice

it's waaay too hot in toronto. where is the snow?? not that i'm complaining, but it's now just dreary dry twigs everywhere since the last maple leaf fell, yet without the glean of snowflakes.

pooopy. it's been a dull long week writing essays and lab reports but i'm enjoy the post-DAT life, at least the heart palpitations are gone. and with that gone, the joy of foofam uniting again finally sank in!

this morning i dreamt of pa. ko me and pa were driving in the ancient volvo to have lunch in one of those hawker centers hidden in the factory office areas where he used to work. think justin was with ma doing something elsewhere. ko and i were both sitting in front with pa driving (don't ask me how). we were just talking about the most mundane topics, how's school, work, life, but i remember feeling an immense surge of warmth and joy to experience pa again. it prodded a part of my heart that was exposed to him that i never did feel again for the past 4.5 years. it's so difficult to retell how it felt, it almost gives meaning to JOY.

anyways after that we were all in church, some fun fair going on as usual. there was this huge vending machine and one of the items was a bag of cheezels the size of my bolster. charm gave me that cheeky grin and climbed into the outlet of the vending machine and appeared on the inside, picked up the lumzum of cheezels and threw it at me. just then, i noticed a police officer talking with pa ma and i signalled to charm to not come out because he'll catch her, but she gave me that crazy laughter and said 'it's okay, he'll just warn me to be careful like he did last time'. so she crept out of the machine and sure enough he walked over. but it was his first day at work and he wanted to arrest us, and we pleaded with him saying we will return the lumzum of cheezels. then we ran off. hrmm. weird, it's like charm and my personality swapped in the dream

anyways, pa ma were just standing by the table talking to other parents in the fellowship hall when i was running off. it felt normal again (: it was nice.

pretty pointless entry, but i like collecting dreams that i remember, while waiting for zyang to come back with my charsiew chee cheong fun!

Lasagna essays

essay essay essay week! gotta go out interview some restaurant owners about their view on styrofoam take-out containers. and write up a long essay on that. for personality psych, my topic's gonna be 'The Middle Child Syndrome and Personality Development'. hahahah, big surprise there. and i'll work on the blood pressure lab over the weekend!

met a singaporean mom of 2 young adult boys today who looked 26 (oh! some global ambiguity of my sentence here), owner of cheese magic and market bakery at kensington. she was nice, made living in toronto seem so normal. juicetine, gotta introduce you to her when you come over, i told her how you're a very pasta (hence will need the cheese) and a very bread person.

anyways, the point of this random blog entry is... i'm attempting to make the World's Best Lasagna today, literally (: not going to add that much meat in there, and using pork instead of beef cuz zyang doesn't like beef smell. excited!

i should take more pictures of my life here, if only i could mount a camera on my bike and blink to activate the shutter.

A little CNA clip on blogging. It's so true about how asian bloggers exaggerate, play up and catharsize on their blogs as opposed to real life and it's the other way round for western bloggers. i'm beginning to like xiaxue (: she real-ly acknowledges the constructed side of her and very comfortably consolidates her two selves into her self-image.

Mark 6:45-51

Take courage, I am here.

-Jesus

A gentle answer turns away wrath

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly.

The eyes of the Lord are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good.

The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.

A fool spurns his father's discipline, but whoever heeds correction shows prudence.

Proverbs 15:1-5

We can allow our emotions to rule or we can walk in the power of the Holy Spirit by adhering to the precepts of His Word, even when our flesh is demanding otherwise (Gal 5:17)

God you're so online.